If you don’t vacuum carpeting frequently enough, it will start to look like Berber.
It’s easy to think babyies are possessed by the Devil after you see them projectile vomit breast milk.
Milk does not do a bed good.
The number of times a child will wake you up in the middle of the night is directly proportional to the number of times you said “no” the day before.
If you let vines grow unchecked, they will eventually form an impenetrable wall blocking out all sunlight and eventually turn the backyard into the cave of doom.
Our laundry machines deserve retirement, but not yet.
The one advantage to super-high gasoline prices is fewer commuter traffic jams.
Our next home will come with a huge toilet flush-handle near the front door for faster cleanup.
Nothing like a computer worm attack to keep a job interesting.
Layoffs suck, but surviving them isn’t all that great, either.